While this is not the "life" I used to live, nor one I'm currently enjoying, I am thankful. I am thankful my body reacted so violently to the first dose, I was physically unable to receive the second.
Nobody expects their life to change so drastically in such a small amount of time. There are no words, remedies, prayers or measures that allow you to fully prepare for it. It wouldn't be fair to ask you to help a cause of which you know nothing about. So let's talk.
Like most of you, I received the COVID-19 vaccine in hopes to protect myself, patients, colleagues, clients, friends and family. Unlike most of you, my protection was short lived.
Upon hearing the news of a vaccine that would allow us to step out of quarantine - hope was restored. Sure we were nervous, but hopeful. Doctors assured me there was a 1/400,000 chance for an adverse reaction. Odds were in my favor right? Wrong.
Following the injection I developed a severe delayed adverse reaction that left me hospitalized. For the past 3 months, my legs can no longer carry my weight and I have been unable to stand without passing out. My blood pressure has dropped so low that my body has been deemed in septic shock and my heart can no longer compensate. Confusion frequents when not enough blood flows to my brain and my limbs turn purple due to lack of circulation. My body is no longer able to maintain homeostasis as my autonomics have malfunctioned and I have been diagnosed with POTS / dysautonomia / hyperadrenergic state as a direct result of the covid vaccine. Neurological diagnosis is pending and should be available within weeks.
A full recovery is hoped for, but not promised. It's a hard reality to face, but it's here - and thankfully, so am I. I would be lying to you if I didn't say it was hard. It is. It is hard to accept the fact that this may be my forever. It is hard to see your body shutdown when the world reopens. And it is hard to no longer have control over your body. I have lost my independence and with that, the majority of myself. As you scroll, you will get a glimpse of my new reality. Days that were once filled with patient care, photoshoots, and travel are now replaced with extensive testing, imaging and doctors visits.